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Written by Uncle Luther
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Saturday, 29 August 2009 22:36 |
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You might be a Methodist if…
- The building fund is more important than the tithe.
- You believe Jesus saves people from their sins— you just aren’t sure everyone has sin and needs saving.
- You believe women can and should be ordained— but you don’t want to ordain them.
- No one in the congregation actually knows what the denomination as a whole believes.
- Your church has to have a traditional and contemporary service, otherwise World War III will break out over the music used during worship.
- You have been in the same church all your life but have gone through 27 new pastors.
- You have never been a Catholic, yet carry around the same amount of guilt.
- A committee meeting is required to determine whether or not to repair a broken window in the sanctuary.
- You can somehow make every situation in life relate to grace in some way.
- You’ve ever wondered why “Blessed Assurance” is in your hymnal.
- The majority of your congregation consists of Baptists who are only Methodists because they don’t want to be called Baptists.
- You actually know the pledge to the Christian flag and the pledge to the Bible.
- You think a new slogan covers a multitude of sins.
- Your church has ever canceled Sunday evening services due to the Super Bowl.
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